The Queen's Puppet
by RoyalNonesuch
Summary: August and Regina have an awkward tete-a-tete at Granny's diner. It's set in the second half of S1. This oneshot arose form my desire to see what an August/Regina pairing might look like. That, and, like so many others, I miss August Booth. R&R is much appreciated. Enjoy!


The Queen's Puppet

"Thanks Ruby", August said to the attractive young waitress as she placed a hot cup of coffee in front of him. Ruby flashed him a smile in return and hurried to another table. It had been another long day for Mr. Booth. Emma was impossible. He'd tried everything to get through to her. At first, he thought he could use his looks to charm his way into her good graces, but that was only a little better than a disaster. Granny took more interest than Emma and that was reason enough to pump the brakes on the tall dark and handsome routine. 'Maybe I was trying too hard' he muttered as he took a sip of the coffee. Even getting Henry to like him wasn't quite enough. He mused like this until someone slid into the seat across form him.

"Is this seat taken?" The mayor of Storybrooke asked, but it wasn't really a question.

"It is now." August replied.

"You seem disappointed—were you hoping for someone else, Sheriff Swan maybe?" Regina said with a hint of a smirk. August smiled wryly.

"No, what would make you think that?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe it's because whenever you're not in your room at Granny's you're with Ms. Swan or making sure she runs into you. If I were a more cynical person, I'd say you were stalking her."

"So you know my comings and goings, but I'm the stalker?"

"Very funny, Mr. Booth. Why are you so interested in Emma?"

"Why do you care?" He shot back.

"Because, Mr. Booth, I am the mayor of this city and it is my job to make sure its citizens are safe." August couldn't' suppress a bit of a laugh at this declaration.

"It's a known fact that freelance writers are very dangerous people."

"Oh that's right. You're supposed to be a writer."

"Yeah, I am a writer"

"Of course you are." Regina said with something approaching ridicule. August cocked his head to one side and wore a quizzical expression.

"Look, Ms. Mayor, unless there is a point to this little conversation I think I'll be getting back to my _writing_" He made a scare quote gesture as he said the last word.

"Mr. Booth. Let's just cut the crap. I know that you know that I know this town is cursed."

"Give me a second to catch up with you there"

"Don't be coy"

"I honestly don't know what you're talking about." Regina laughed when he said this. August's look of indifference dropped for a few moments.

"For someone so practiced at it, you're a terrible liar Mr. Booth". August shot her a winning smile.

"No one said I was supposed to be good at it". Regina seemed genuinely amused. He fixed his gaze on her dark eyes more directly. "If you know who I am, you must know that I know who you are."

"Yes Mr. Booth, I know who you are, but I don't know why you're here—but I think I've figured it out." August's expressive eyes started to take on a slightly melancholy look.

"I'm curious to hear this, your majesty."

"I still love the sound of that. Well it's fairly obvious that you are desperately in love with Miss Swan—it's pathetic the way you follow her around. I don't think I've seen a man, who was not utterly hideous to look at, try and fail so many times to get a woman to have a drink with him" August heard this report with relief—Regina had no idea why he was really in Storybrooke, but the characterization of his behavior did sting a little. "I just don't understand why everyone seems to love her so much. It's sickening". Instead of answering, August opted for a mildly lovelorn look.

"Aww, don't feel bad," she said with mock kindness, "Miss Swan probably doesn't even know you're interested. She has trouble recognizing what's right in front of her. ". August started to think he wasn't such a bad liar after all.

"Believe me, I agree."

"I'm starting to think she must be Goldielocks. All these men, and none of them seem to be just righto her taste." Regina said with open contempt.

"I know right?" August was actually beginning to wonder if Emma was the famed home invader. She did have that blonde hair after all.

"This brings me to the point of this little tete-a-tete Mr. Booth."

"Which would be?"

"I want you to be my…escort". August appeared slightly taken a back, but he didn't lose his relaxed demeanor.

"I don't mean to insult you, but there is not enough booze in Storybrooke to make being your new boy toy sound like a good idea."

"Did someone say booze?" Granny interjected. "If you want a drink, I'm going to have to see an I.D., young man." She smiled suggestively. August had no idea how he should respond to that, so he just made a "no thank you gesture". Once Granny went on her way, Regina turned her sizzling gaze back on the man across form her.

"Boy toy? Don't flatter yourself Mr. Booth. A pair of stunning blue eyes does not a boy toy make. This is about Miss Swan. I want to make her wonder what I'm up to, you want to make her want you. She can't resist taking what I have, so she'll be after you in a matter of days. This proposal seems good for both parties". August mulled over her proposal, it had a twisted logic, but it was obvious Regina wanted more than to annoy Emma. She went on: "Might I ask why you are reluctant to accept my offer? You don't seem to be too principled of a person. Going to Toyland when you're father needed you? " A Toyland reference? That was just too cold.

"How can I put this", he leaned forward a little for emphasis, " you have a bit of a reputation for ripping men's hearts out" A peal of pretty, but cold laughter was his reply.

"Mr. Booth, do I sense a bit of fear?" August leaned back; this woman was even more difficult than Emma.

"It's not fear, your majesty, it's self-preservation, there's big difference. One is cowardly, one is just smart."

"If you want to preserve yourself, my dear, you will do what I want…Something tells me you already know that. Is it how I look? Am I not your type?" She said this with a beguiling smile. This was definitely a trap, and he didn't plan to fall into it.

"No, you look wonderful; it's almost as if time stopped when you turned thirty" She smirked at the reference.

"You're impudent, I enjoy that….Then what's wrong? Do you believe there is something wrong with two adults having a relationship?"

"Oh no, not on the face of it I guess. It' just the last time I saw you, I was 7 years old…and a puppet."

"Point taken." An awkward pause ensued. August desperately wanted to leave, but he knew that would be a catastrophic mistake. Ruby walked by, ostensibly she was checking to see if their coffee cups needed to be filled, but it was obvious she was eavesdropping. Regina noticed. Once Ruby passed by, she opened her fashionable clutch purse and pulled out a card. She stood up and handed it to him. "Contact me if gather up the courage." August took the little card and studied it for a second. "Oh and August, I promise, no strings attached." She smiled knowingly. He smiled back; it was pretty clever after all.

"Hey Granny," August said as he slipped the card into his pocket, "can I have that drink now?"


End file.
